Post Number: 5
|Posted on Thursday, May 17, 2007 - 09:00 pm: ||
Since I wrote these some time ago I felt I could not use them in the contest. Hope you like them - the price is right in any case!
A heavy player named Ray,
Found no bottom willing to play,
‘Til Leatherass Milly,
Said, “You may spank me silly,
I need to get off that way.”
There once was a lady from Grasse,
Whose man loved to spank her ass,
She’d wiggle and groan,
Then exclaim with a moan,
“Ça suffie! Assez! Je suis lasse!”
A sub seeking perfect submission,
Listed sins of omission and commission.
Her Dom ceased discussion,
Employed strict percussion,
Now her brattiness has gone into remission!
Pony girls like curb bit and bridle,
My lady likes it even more wild,
Her idea of fun,
Is a red glowing bum,
Spare the rod, or spoil the child?
As a child his wiley he’d wank,
‘Til his mother would give him a spank,
This so cemented the relations,
Of these varied sensations,
He cums now, if hit with a plank.
Other kinky stuff:
A kinky young lass from Ghent,
Felt a burning from whence she went,
It wasn’t infection,
But a peppermint confection,
That somehow got lodged in her vent!
A kinky Greek miss named Rika.
Inserted marbles into her urethra
She kept playing about,
But they wouldn’t come out...
‘Til she peed - THEN she screamed “Eureka!”
A wannabe Dom named Dave,
Seeks a service sub for a slave,
“She’ll do my housework;
On the computer I’ll lurk,
Commanding cybersluts to obey!”
About to be poked with a needle,
My sub began to beg, plead, and wheedle,
So I gave her the “look”,
Brought out a 10 gauge hook....
We had to stop and clean up her peedle!
And more not so kinky:
As Archimedes sat in his bath,
He slipped a finger up into his ass,
His growing erection,
Sparked a logical connection,
Density times VOLUME is mass!
A young lady more willing than wise,
Felt a hand caressing her thigh,
“I will surely expire,
If that hand travels higher”,
“Oh! I die!” she exclaimed with a sigh.
For the young girl, sex was mysterious.
At twenty it made her delirious.
But her husband has strayed,
Half a dozen he’s laid.
Now it just makes her plain furious!
Other Favourites, NOT My originals!
A Dom to his sub from Saskatchewan,
“You have something no one can match you on.
I’m referring, my Dear,
To that place in the rear,
That gives me such pleasure to smack you on.”
There once was a miner named Dave,
Who kept a dead whore in his cave.
“She’s missing a tit,
And stinks quite a bit,
But look at the money I save!”
Post Number: 2095
|Posted on Wednesday, May 30, 2007 - 08:54 pm: ||
Very nice Peter....
I'm waiting for some more!!
Post Number: 17
|Posted on Saturday, June 02, 2007 - 10:14 pm: ||
Thanks, here's one for you:
Tammy just wanted to stay on the Right side,
Though all her friends went over to the Dark side.
So she tried to be nice,
But doesn’t suffice,
She’s being tempted by evil’s bright side.
Perhaps I will try something on DD since many here are into that.
Post Number: 1531
|Posted on Saturday, June 02, 2007 - 10:46 pm: ||
Peter, that was great.
Tammy, it's only a matter of time...
Post Number: 2113
|Posted on Sunday, June 03, 2007 - 12:16 pm: ||
You all crack me up!!
That was great Peter!!!
Post Number: 18
|Posted on Sunday, June 03, 2007 - 12:36 pm: ||
Methinks I don't have enough to do....
A young woman craved strict discipline,
But striking a woman seemed a grievous sin,
So her beau hesitated,
But she remonstrated,
Until she acquired some reddened skin!
Post Number: 384
|Posted on Sunday, June 03, 2007 - 04:12 pm: ||
Not enough to do? Nah -- Just a great sense of humour!
Post Number: 2118
|Posted on Sunday, June 03, 2007 - 06:02 pm: ||
Very good Peter!!!
Post Number: 29
|Posted on Wednesday, August 08, 2007 - 04:49 pm: ||
There is a young lady named Tammy
Who lives somewhere north of Miami
She asked her dear Nexus
If he’d buy her a Lexus
He responded by whipping her fanny
Post Number: 2280
|Posted on Wednesday, August 08, 2007 - 06:23 pm: ||
That is great Hardwood!!
It not only made me laugh but my dear husband aka Nexus laugh as well!!
Thanks Hardwood I needed that today!!!
Post Number: 213
|Posted on Friday, August 10, 2007 - 07:55 am: ||
Yall are good!!!! These are great fun keep um comin!
Once a princess always a princess