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Spankingcouple
New member
Username: Spankingcouple
Post Number: 34
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 21, 2005 - 10:06 am: | 
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good morning,
we were in our bedroom(door not locked)and one of my 5 year old walks in during a spanking. i got up,just minutes before, to check on the girls and they were both sleeping. i got back to our bedroom and forgot to lock the door behind me,big mistake. I was horrified when i turned around and saw her looking at us. i got up off my husband's lap and put a robe on and told my little girl to go back to bed it wasn't time to get up. what do i say to her she is 5? I am at a complete lose. she asked "why was daddy spanking you mommy" what was i to say?
Trish |
Gandalf302
New member
Username: Gandalf302
Post Number: 2
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 21, 2005 - 10:43 am: |
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Hi Trish, I have worked with kids as an educator all my life and have had lots of "issues" brought before me -- just tell her - so that perspective is where I am coming from. Since it has happened and the question was asked - you need a response that is both true and one that is believable. Tell her you and your husband were playing adult games and spanking is one of the games you play. Leave it there say no more unless your child asks more then be as truthful as you need to be. Because you were being physical with each other you MUST not ignore this -- lots of games are physical from football (even touch football can cause accidental harm) basketball both sexs play it -- lots ofr games require physicality. If she persists tell her the game required the looser to get a spanking and it was NOT a beating or abuse but something you both do for fun and even sayh if persistence goes on that it is something lots of married people do and have done, you were not being hurt or abused but were having fun with each other like when kids play make-believe. OK that is it donot lie do not go further than you need to go just be truthful but not any more specific than is required. Kids knowing you were playing might let it go at that and no more will be said. Also if it happens again, (YOU might be herd) just say yes were playing our game and I lost again.
Gandalf} |
Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 872
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 21, 2005 - 10:48 am: |
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I like that idea Gandalf, since most kids love games and understand the loser get's some kind of forfeit. Saying that you had been playing a game and Mommy lost, so Daddy was giving her a "pretend" spanking seems like a good way to handle the problem. 
And welcome to the Den by the way. 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
3 wise men? Be serious....
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 542
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 21, 2005 - 10:52 am: |
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Very good Gandalf and Wolfie. Let the child know that it's a game for fun...even if it's a punishment spanking and you're caught. Most kids are not effected if you're truthful with them.
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Lil_miss_wayward
New member
Username: Lil_miss_wayward
Post Number: 22
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 21, 2005 - 01:49 pm: |
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I just have a question, mainly directed to Gandalf, but how would you deal with the situation where the 5 year old plays a game with a friend and is caught wanting to playfully spank them because their friend lost or be spanked themselves? I know spanking is harmless among children, but still not a lot of people see it that way.
The idea you had Gandalf was a good one, and I would suggest that Trish just reassured her child that "mommy and daddy were playing", but I wouldn't carry it further than that because afterall kids reinact what their parents (adults)do because their parents are the role models.
I don't think this post sounded offensive in any way, but if it has been i'm sorry, and really Trish do not worry about it much, she is 5 and having worked with many 5 year olds. I bet she will soon forget and it will be yesterday's news. Just don't make a big deal out of the situation!
~lil miss Charlotte~
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Katie_spades
Junior Spanko
Username: Katie_spades
Post Number: 105
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 21, 2005 - 05:39 pm: |
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Since I don't have children I really have no comment as this is quite difficult but Galdalf had some pretty good ideas. The game thing sounds good. Good luck!
I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.
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Spankingcouple
New member
Username: Spankingcouple
Post Number: 35
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 21, 2005 - 07:20 pm: |
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thanks everyone for all your good advice. I sat down this afternoon with Gillian (5) and we had a good talk. she is a very bright child. I wanted to be honest with her so i told her the truth "mommy was naughty this morning that's why i was getting a spanking". she understands that a spanking is given when you're naughty so i thought it would be the best way to explaine what she saw. she asked "mommy gets spankings too". i looked at her and said "yes mommy gets spanking also" . she looked at me and shrugged her shoulders and said "OK mommy" and got off the couch and began playing with some toys. I will not bring it up again and i will make sure the bedroom door is LOCKED!
again thanks for all your good advice,
trish |
Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 546
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 21, 2005 - 07:57 pm: |
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Kids are amazing aren't they? A surprise every day. I miss my kids being little.
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Spankingcouple
New member
Username: Spankingcouple
Post Number: 36
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 08:15 am: |
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good morning,
kids are amazing. my two girls are very bright and inquizitive. Gillian asked me last night before bed if daddy got spanked too i told her no it was just us girls. i had to bit my tounge and not laugh. the things that come out of their mouth's blows me away. i hope she dropd this whole spanking thing but she seems to still be thinking about it.
have a great day,
trish |
Ftopinmichigan
Spanko
Username: Ftopinmichigan
Post Number: 267
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 10:05 am: |
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I think you handled the initial question great. Brava!
As for saying "only girls get spanked"...I'm thinking that she's probably REALLY thinking hard on that one, and wondering why. I'm sure that she's figured out that boys are naughty too! 
My bet is more questions will come up....and hopefully she'll just be asking you. 
K |
Spankingcouple
New member
Username: Spankingcouple
Post Number: 37
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 10:16 am: |
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hi K,
i think you are right. i should have answered her question in another way. she's very inquizitive so she may ask more questions. we are a very close family and we talk about everything. this is the first time "my" spankings have come up and it's a bit uncomforable to talk about to my 5 year old. it's not that she dosn't know what spankings are but for mommy to get spanked...that's different.
trish |
Gandalf302
New member
Username: Gandalf302
Post Number: 7
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 11:30 am: |
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HI again, Trish, If your kids are inquisitive you should as Charlotte says make it clear that Boys or men do get spanked too even if it is not your WAY of actually doing it. If the girls hear it form others and talk about it and see it as an adult game it is ok. If the persistence continues - YOU can say YOU almost always end up getting spanked and it is OK with you. Oh, you might also have a child who is like YOU! It will as you already know not go away if the interset is there and burying it will not change anything. I wish you good luck with your girls as raising children is great and always a challange. }
(Dave/ Gandalf) |
Pagan
Spanko
Username: Pagan
Post Number: 302
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 04:44 pm: |
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I would not personally have been that honest, but that's just me.
Kids tend to repeat things. And if they think it's no big deal, all the more so.
I would NOT want my daughter to casually mention to Grandma or her teacher that mommies get spanked if they're bad/naughty. Might raise an eyebrow or two. And lead to real questions.
Now...if she told the story and said "Mommy and Daddy were play-fighting and he spanked her", I'd be less concerned. Still embarrassing of course, but less likely to result in a visit from a nice officer. |
Spankingcouple
New member
Username: Spankingcouple
Post Number: 38
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 05:13 pm: |
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thank you for all your good advice. i have since had another talk with Gillian and we are at an understanding that this matter will not be mentioned to anyone else. she promised me it wouldn't be. i reminded her of the consequenses of breaking a promise. she understands and for me the matter is put to rest. hope i did the right thing of giving her an ultimatume but i didn't know what else to do.
thanks again,
trish |
Katie_spades
Junior Spanko
Username: Katie_spades
Post Number: 109
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 06:13 pm: |
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Good luck with that. Hopefully it won't be one of those things that just kind of gets slipped out.
I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.
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