Post Number: 1
|Posted on Friday, October 07, 2005 - 04:04 pm: ||
Hello to all. I am new to this and I am hoping that I can get some information as to how to get my with to spank me. I am not looking to end up with blood marks or blisters, just an old fashion OTK spanking when I deserve it. I think that it could help us and make us closer. I think that it also could make it easier for her to assume the dominate role in the marriage and for me to let her. When we have discussed this, she tells me it is not in her personality to do this. How can I get her to understand that it could be fun, and could help us at the same time. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
Post Number: 612
|Posted on Saturday, October 08, 2005 - 06:50 pm: ||
Well, 1st of all welcome to the den. You don't want to push her into it, or she may resent you for it. Things you might try are printing out stories about women spanking men that appeal to you, as well as doing some research on the topic (the internet is full of wonderful items about spanking) You need to be open and honest withher about your wants and needs. Weather they may be spanking for fun, or discipline, you both need to do a lot of reserch and talking, until you can come to a comon ground on the topic. Do not expect her to accept it or change her mind over night, it takes a long time to change things, and sometimes you can't change it no matter what you try. good luck, and if you have any other questions just ask.
Babyj- worlds cutest little brat!
Post Number: 14
|Posted on Sunday, October 09, 2005 - 10:01 am: ||
Hi edgedout! Converting a vanilla mate is like a magic trick. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it's only an illusion. Success would be to have her fully realize your own desire, and then have a strong passion to enjoy it "with" you.
My suggestion would be to forgo the idea of "discipline" when starting out. I'm an experienced spanker and dishing out real discipline or deserved punishment is not a fun experience....it's a chore, and VERY hard to do.
Try to show her the erotic side to spanking fun. Show her that it can be a passionate and sensual act, and when she begins to see (and feel) your reactions, it may spark her to apply even more attention to your behind.
The other thing that you might consider...be careful what you ask for...you just might get it!!! Hopefully..anyway.
Post Number: 15
|Posted on Friday, October 28, 2005 - 12:56 am: ||
Edgeodout, this is a question asked by so many of us. What I've done successfully? I ask my significant other, who in many cases has started out very vanilla, to apply a couple of good sharp slaps across my buns while having sex in the missionary position. This will benefit her in a most pleasant way. She'll notice you've become a man of steel after these whacks and will love it. (natural viagra) Eventually you'll probably end up across her lap as a prelude to sex and from there-watch out what you've asked for? You may have created a monster! Something I always welcomed…lol
Post Number: 66
|Posted on Wednesday, November 09, 2005 - 10:29 am: ||
And then I have to convince her that I like what I call love blisters. Not a good way to start though. Ftop was right on the money, fun and erotic is where it's at for real, speaking for myself.I've propably been lucky or wondered if we attract each other somehow? But, I think there are plenty of spanko's that don't know it yet.
Is IT Better To Give Than To Recieve?
Post Number: 7
|Posted on Thursday, November 10, 2005 - 09:33 pm: ||
I agree with everyone who has posted. You need to start slowly and communicate with your wife. I, too, have struggled with this as my fantasies and desires have me wanting for a good spanking, but I have to remember that my wife is relatively new to this. She is very much a vanilla and uncomfortable with some more kinky sex play.
Thas said, she is wonderful and has been non-judgemental about my 'interests' but she is uncomfortable with the idea of hurting me. I have explained to her that it isn't really hurting me and we started out slowly and she is learning what I like. It has opened up our dialogue and helped us communicate with each other openly.
I still wish she would give me a good punishment spanking every now and again, but we're working our way there slowly.
Post Number: 2
|Posted on Thursday, November 24, 2005 - 02:52 pm: ||
I'm new here but have been in your position in the past with a girlfriend who was strongly opposed to spanking. After a short period of time (couple of months), she was giving out spankings like breath mints! Seriously.
This is what worked for me. When we first started talking about our desires, I initially declined to go into spanking because she had just shared hers and spanking (giving or receiving) she found not a turn on at all. I think she even called it weird.
So, I started to tell her and couldn't bring myself to do it. This really piqued her curiosity. After some coaxing, I finally told her about some spanking. Knowing that I was tentative to tell her in the first place, she was a calm in her response (but I could see she was NOT into it). Still, her response allowed us to discuss some things (very light spanking conversation as I didn't want to totally freak her out.)
Anyway, we emailed each other daily and I told her I would give her a "fantasy" story of her and I that included a little spanking.
Again, my story was very light in the spanking sense but it conveyed that spanking was not always this whips and chains type of thing.
We exchanged stories quite a few times. Each one allowing me to delve a little further.
When the first opportunity came up to spank me, she felt strange about it and I didn't push her. We had a very romantic evening. The next morning however, I was being a bit of a brat and she took her belt to me! After the spanking we had great sex and I made sure I did the things that she really liked.
I also think she enjoyed the power of it all and the trust and the excitement.
From that point on, she was LOOKING for reasons to spank me.
Sorry for the book but just wanted to hopefully give you an idea or two to try.