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Kellbell
New member
Username: Kellbell

Post Number: 7
Registered: 10-2007
Posted on Sunday, November 11, 2007 - 10:43 pm:   Edit Post

This weekend, my fiance and I went out to the bars. I saw an old boyfriend and decided against my better judgement to talk to him. The bar has two sides, my fiance went to our usual side and I stayed to talk to my ex.
After an hour of spending time with my ex (it was very innocent) my fiance came to find me. He's not usally the jealous type, but I could tell that he was not happy!
When we got home, I was ordered to strip down and lay over the edge of the bed, my butt in the air. I was nervous, we've had fun spankings, but never has he "punished" me. As I lay over the back of the bed, he tells me how disappointed he is in my behavior at the bar, and that this was a spanking I'd always remember.
First he gave me a 5 minute warmup spanking with his hand...hard. By the end of the warmup my butt was hot to the touch and was already a rosy red.
Next was the sound of his belt leaving the hoops of his jeans. I cringed, never have I ever been spanked with a belt. I was excited and nervous at the same time.
First he caressed my bottom with it, telling me how I deserved this spanking. Then without warning it came across my behind with a distinctive crack. I inhaled sharply at the immense pain searing through my bottom. Again and again he cracked the belt. When I fell to my knees I was order to standup and bend back over. He took the belt and wrapped it around my waist and continued spanking me with his hand. I thought the spanking was almost over when he slipped the belt off my waist and begin to spank me again with it. I instinctively put my hands over my bottom. He took my arms and pinned them to my back and for a good 10 minutes my thrashing continued. I have never been spanked before so as anyone can imagine there is nothing like the emotion that goes through someone bent over, ass in the air while a belt repeatedly crashes over it over and over and over. He stood me up, and asked if I thought that the punishment should end. I was scared to answer no, and said please, spank my bottom til you think I will be a good girl. He gently laid me back over the bed and continued the whipping. At the end I was gasping for air, trying to rub out the pain but he kept my hands pinned.
After a couple of minutes he held me, and said that he loved giving me a long hard spanking and to know that many more are to come in my future when he felt like they were needed.
Then we made love and I knew that this was the man I am supposed to marry!
Discovering a whole new world...
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 3350
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Monday, November 12, 2007 - 05:58 pm:   Edit Post

I have been hesitant to respond to this post, because it WAS a consentual spanking and kellbell sounds as if she did indeed enjoy it.
That said, as a crisis counselor, it sets off a bit of an alarm with me. It sounds as if he spanked/whipped her because he was jealous. I know that some people think that jealousy is a form of love (and I am NOT suggesting that is the case here) but to the lurkers out there, I will only say that jealousy is not a sign of love nor a legitimate reason to "punish" anyone.
Many spanking couple like to play mock discipline, and there is certainly nothing wrong with that, but anytime someone is disciplined in true anger, I believe it is a good idea to take a step back and look at the relationship.
Queen of Innocence

"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Kellbell
New member
Username: Kellbell

Post Number: 8
Registered: 10-2007
Posted on Monday, November 12, 2007 - 06:52 pm:   Edit Post

i asked him to do it, but thanks for asking. we planned on doing the punishment spanking that night, and we just used the ex as an excuse. i've always wanted to know what one felt like it was more of a lead into sex. don't go counselor on me. i'm in a loving relationship and have to tell him its ok to spank me hard. so, back off thanx :-)
Discovering a whole new world...
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Rand
New member
Username: Rand

Post Number: 3
Registered: 11-2007
Posted on Monday, November 12, 2007 - 08:55 pm:   Edit Post

As a newbie, I am a little confused.

There is a lot of DD talk on this site. I am not exactly clear about the line. I do understand that the arrangement of giving/recieving punishment is consensual, but is a punishment spanking really just play mock discipline?

Some people talk about getting "what they deserve" and how they don't look forward to punisment spankings.

I don't really understand the line. I understand the desire to feel powerless and taken care of at the same time. However, in some of the DD discussion, it sound like spanking is used as behavior control and not a sexual experience.

Like in this case, the anger of the dom was just role playing. But is it always like that? Are DD relationships about more then just acting?
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Kellbell
New member
Username: Kellbell

Post Number: 10
Registered: 10-2007
Posted on Monday, November 12, 2007 - 11:26 pm:   Edit Post

Hey Rand,
I'm new to this stuff too, but from what I gather there are two types of spanking. Role play and for real...:-) Luckily, my partner and I do role play, its fun and kinky and we both get something out of it. There are people out there that look for actual punishment with no sexual reward at the end...they just want to be punished for their transgressions.
The DD relationship I have w/ my partner is just role playing. But if your looking for more than acting, just request that to whomever you share your spanking experience with. Hope this helps!
Ahhh I've learned so much in so little time!
Discovering a whole new world...
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Admin
Board Administrator
Username: Admin

Post Number: 102
Registered: 03-2005


Posted on Tuesday, November 13, 2007 - 01:05 am:   Edit Post

Kellbell, I'm sending you a PM, please look for it.
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 3351
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Tuesday, November 13, 2007 - 08:54 am:   Edit Post

Dear Kellbell,
Please read the site protocol as you will see that your aggressive lines of "don't go counselor on me" and "so, back off" are against site rules. I was very careful in explaining that I was not referring to your particular relationship, but a word of advice to the lurkers our there. That is part of my job description as a moderator.

I expect the same respect I showed you, to be returned.
Queen of Innocence

"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Kellbell
New member
Username: Kellbell

Post Number: 11
Registered: 10-2007
Posted on Tuesday, November 13, 2007 - 09:37 am:   Edit Post

Dear everyone who reads this story/posts. I was unaware that my story seemed to be more than just role playing, but thats all it is :-) We had fun doing it. I also apologize publicly to fanny and admin for the off the wall remarks. Yes there were disrespectful. I felt personally attacked at first, but realize it was for the benefit of everyone. I just wanted to post a story that everyone would like to read. So I hope ya'll still like it. I'm the example of how not to post :-) Sorry again
Discovering a whole new world...
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Petergrimm
Junior Spanko
Username: Petergrimm

Post Number: 72
Registered: 05-2007
Posted on Tuesday, November 13, 2007 - 08:01 pm:   Edit Post

Kellbell and Rand: there are approximately as many different kinds of spanking as there are spankers and spankos. And none are the better or right and only way!
Some (like myself) like beimg spanked simply because they "like" the sensations. Some (like my wife) like spanking only as part of sex - not a "preliminary to" but "part of". For others it is only sort of foreplay - sex afterwards does not include further spanking. Broadly speaking, spanking for sensation or sexual purposes is usually lumped together as "erotic spanking"

Still others use spanking to provide a grounding or focus - it helps them maintain a mental stability. Others have a D/s (Dominant/submissive) relationship where spanking by the dominant is part and parcel of the mental and emotional D/s dynamic and may or may not be erotic or diciplinary in nature. Others may do almost the exact same things but with out the D/s mindset - and think of themselves as Top and bottom. Spanking as part of maintaining a dersirable mental or emotional state can be broadly classed as "Maintenance spanking" Keep in mind these terms get appropriated by individual spankers and may mean something different to that person. Here I am talking only in generalities.

Still others are into "Discipline spanking" which may or may not have a sexual component. One person may seek discipline to help themselves be better in some way (curb "bad" behaviours). Others may need it to feel secure and safe or cared for; discipline being a manifestation that someone cares what they do and is looking out for them. One form of this is refered to as DD - Domestic discipline - which may have elements of D/s or a sort of retro power structure with a Head of the household (HOH)and a keeper of the home. Others have a Disciplinarian who may provide discipline with only minimal other interaction with the spankee.

In all these broad classes, there may be considerable roleplay - acting in certain set ways leading up to and during spanking, through to almost no roleplay at all. For those with roleplay there may be a whole different persona adopted during the scene. There can be props and costumes. Some are clearly aware they are roleplaying, others seem to do it subconciously and would be offended if accused of "acting a role."

For some spanking couples the "reason" or justification for a disciplinary spanking can be very infrequent and needs to be very serious, for others it may be totally fabricated just to "force"a spanking - by mutual consent an otherwise innocent incident is made into a spanking "offense" Other couples have "rules" set in place for the spankee that may have a genuine purpose, or they may simply be a construct that will ensure the spankee fails to obey all the rules so a spanking is in order. Some stretch otherwise typical and sometimes minor safety concerns (eg speeding, failure to lock a door, or to report in if delayed) into justification for spanking (with appropriate elements of care and concern).

Some spankos only indulge in one form of spanking, others mix and match. Most of us started one way and our spanking has evolved with our maturity and physical age. Most of us are or try to be tolerant of the other types of spanking, but many of us are sensitized to the vanilla world's reaction to spanking in general. Thus the rules in place at the Den are in-part to support that tolerance but also protect the community from vanilla's getting erroneous impressions or further ammunition.... Occasionally some of us cross them (and deserve a spanking) usually due to the limitations of our prose more than our actual intent. Rightly the moderators jump-in - either to clarify or in some cases edit. The Den is the great place it is due to Bethie and that erstwhile corp of mods and I thank them for it - even when they are rapping MY knuckles. I was pleased to see your 11th post Kellbell - it is just more proof spankers are a good bunch of people!

regards,
Peter
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 3353
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Tuesday, November 13, 2007 - 09:24 pm:   Edit Post

Thank you Peter for your lengthy clarification. Being an admin or moderator is at times a tedious job, and it is hard being labeled as the "bad guys". I truly appreciate kellbells sincere apology.
What members do not always realize is the huge number of non-members or members who read but not post is in the thousands. As Peter stated it is important that we are not misinterpreted by vanillas. We cannot expect others to be judgemental of our fetish, if we are into name calling ourselves.
I'm happy to say that the whole issue has been cleared up and the world again spins right again.
Queen of Innocence

"Well behaved woman rarely make history"

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