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Spanking Den * Spanking Discussion Area * April - Dec 2005 * April - August 2005 Threads * Have you ever not received/given discipline when it was deserved? < Previous Next >

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Plezurscry
New member
Username: Plezurscry

Post Number: 6
Registered: 04-2005
Posted on Friday, May 20, 2005 - 09:49 pm:   Edit Post

Don't want to get anyone into trouble here. I'm mostly curious as to why it wasn't given or received but also was there an alternate route to resolving issue?
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 235
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Friday, May 20, 2005 - 11:56 pm:   Edit Post

No answer here, I always get caught. As far as my husband goes, there is only one route to resolving issues.
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Darwins
Spanko
Username: Darwins

Post Number: 57
Registered: 04-2005


Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 04:17 am:   Edit Post

The simple answer to your question is yes, there have been times when a punishment has been deserved but not given.

The reason is perhaps not quite so simple.

Punishment, any punishment is a serious issue, and what your punishing for is almost irrelevant to the question since the dynamics and rules of every relationship are different. But, anyone accepting the responsibility to administer punishment has a duty to look beyond the actual offence. In many cases it is just a question of carelessness, or forgetfulness, and ninety-nine times out of one hundred this is all it is.

But it is that odd one that you have to look out for, and examine the underlying reason why it happened. Often, despite thinking we pay attention religiously to our partners wants and needs we don’t, and that is not a criticism it is unfortunately a simple fact of life. And, it is at those times when we are not paying close attention – when life is getting in the way, jobs going south etc, that problems occur that we miss.

We like to think that if there is a problem our partners will come to us and spill all and then we like the infallible people we are will just simply fix it! Yea right! They have a problem, they want to tell you about it but for some reason they can’t – what they REALLY want is for you to notice it and sit them down and say something like “ok young lady spill it and lets get it sorted out”, but of course you miss it so you don’t.

That is often the time when they try another tact……..”lets do something to get punished for – that will get his attention”

I didn’t say it was rational, but it does happen because they know that they will then have your undivided attention – and of course because your infallible you will spot the real problem and all will be right with the world.

So yes, sometimes punishments are not carried out – if that is your lucky enough to spot that there is an underlying cause to this that does not relate to the punishable offence. In those circumstances talking is the only real solution. That’s not to say that at some point the young lady might not get her backside warmed – but for not coming to you in the first place rather than for the punishable offence.

I hope that makes some sense

Good question.

Steve

I'm a king bee baby Buzzing round your hive
we can make honey baby if you let me come inside
Come on babe lets buzzzzz a while.
(Rolling Stones)
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Chantryss
New member
Username: Chantryss

Post Number: 11
Registered: 05-2005
Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 09:31 am:   Edit Post

Darwins: Your response is right on the mark. Thank you for articulating it so very well. You show an understanding of your partner and her internal motivations, as well as your own, that is wonderful to see.

Plezurscry: I've done many things that I needed discipline for having done. In my case, my Dominant prefers spanking for pleasure ( me too, in reality) and won't use that for punishment. Unfortunately, he often doesn't dole out the punishment at all, which I find very frustrating, because it is something that I want so badly from him. I have had to learn to accept, that he isn't wired to give it to me in a physical sense. Sadly, that somehow makes knowing that I have disappointed him EVEN worse for me, as it often takes longer to clear the air and feel that things are back on good ground with us, than I think it would if he'd punish me and I could be done with it.




Kelly
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 238
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 10:33 am:   Edit Post

Exactly, Kelly, I can't take the tension when things are not "right". Since my spanking partner is my long term husband, he knows me and my emotions/actions very well. It doesn't help that I am such an easy book to "read". Whether the spanking is needed for fun or for infractions, he just KNOWS it. I am emotional in the fact that my passions run high, when I am happy it is obvious, and when I am bothered by anything at all, it is just as obvious. When I am in a mischievious mood, I start pushing those buttons!! It is one of those goodnews/badnews type of things, so I never get away with a thing.
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 239
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 10:37 am:   Edit Post

Kind of like on this board, if you are paying attention.
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Wyatt
Spanko
Username: Wyatt

Post Number: 77
Registered: 04-2005


Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 10:47 am:   Edit Post

da..dum de de de..da.... Huh?... What?
I'm sorry, It's that MALE selective hearing thing......What did you say?
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 244
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 10:55 am:   Edit Post

Not a thing, SIR.
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Wyatt
Spanko
Username: Wyatt

Post Number: 78
Registered: 04-2005


Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 01:14 pm:   Edit Post

Heeey. I LIKE that!

*Fanny's a GG around Wyatt for some reason*
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 245
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 02:06 pm:   Edit Post

Absolutely, sir. Anything I can get for you? Are you comfy? Need a drink?
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Wyatt
Spanko
Username: Wyatt

Post Number: 79
Registered: 04-2005


Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 03:01 pm:   Edit Post

No thank you, dear. Well....It is this weekend,...I would like a Bacardi and Diet Coke please. If it's not to much trouble, and thank you for asking. You're being so sweet.......
I can't imagine why. *smiling*
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 247
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Saturday, May 21, 2005 - 03:38 pm:   Edit Post

May I join you, as that is my beverage of choice.
Sweet? Why of course!

Remember what I posted:
There was a little girl
Who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead
When she was good, she was VERY,VERY good
And when she was bad, she was horrid.


I know no middle ground, Wyatt. And since I have learned you shot first, then ask questions, I will not be taking my chances. (For awhile anyway.)

But don't get too used to it.
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Wyatt
Spanko
Username: Wyatt

Post Number: 81
Registered: 04-2005


Posted on Sunday, May 22, 2005 - 12:49 pm:   Edit Post

Sure! Get us both one.
And here's to a great weekend!

Aaaahhh.... PERFECT! You make a good 'cardi-coke!

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