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Spanking Den * Spanking Discussion Area * February 2006 * Problems crying? < Previous Next >

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Babyj
Advanced Spanko
Username: Babyj

Post Number: 533
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Monday, January 16, 2006 - 09:08 pm:   Edit Post

I have been needing the release of crying durring a spanking for years and not been able to do so. I recently recieved some great advice that I think may help. The last time my husband spanked me I actually began to tear up, didn't cry but it is a start. hope this helps someone else as well.

I think I may know why you can't cry when being
spanked. You have programmmed yourself, possibly when
being spanked by your parents to not feel the pain or
to not cry. A book called PsychoCybernetics by
Maxwell Maltz explains what happens. You may can find
it in the public library or buy a copy from
Amazon.com.

What we think about becomes a program for our
subconscious mind to carry out. Ever wonder why you
want to do something even though logically you
shouldn't? Its cause your subconscious mind makes you
want to do it.

The way to overcome this is to relax for several
minutes clearing your mind of all distractions.
Imagine your spanker, someone that you want to spank
you til you cry, scolding you, then taking down your
pants and laying you over his lap. Then imagine
watching yourself like you were on TV, lying over his
lap. Then imagine each smack on your bare bottom,
hear each one, react by tightening your bottom, jump
at each smack, then relax your bottom, anticipating
the next smack. Feel the pain spread thru your
bottom, feel the heat warm you. Make a sound as each
blow hits your bottom. Take a shrill breath. Kick your
legs. Wiggle over the man's lap. Imagine yourself
beginning to tear up.

Then imagine yourself crying softly. After a few more
smacks, imagine yourself crying hard with tears
streaming down your face.

Try this mental exercise several times a day. Just be
sure to relax before you begin.

just to explain a lil I was abused by my parents and this is all true I did program myself not to cry or to hurt. This is something that seems to be helping me, I am hopeing the next time I am spanked I actually cry as well as tear up. good luck and I hope this is of some help to others too.
I do behaive....
not my fault we don't agree how.....
(M60's Girl)
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Hunny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Hunny

Post Number: 1291
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Monday, January 16, 2006 - 09:24 pm:   Edit Post

Although I was not physically abused I felt the same pain from my parents. I was personally verbally abused and I too shut down and refused to cry. I have never cried because of a spanking, but I tried to. I felt like something was wrong with me and I just couldn't cry. Thanks for your advice, Babyj! I really hope it works!
I'm just a little angel...sometimes!
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Babyj
Advanced Spanko
Username: Babyj

Post Number: 536
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Monday, January 16, 2006 - 09:39 pm:   Edit Post

your welcome Hunny, I hope it works for you too. I long for the release so I know you must as well. good luck and let me know how it goes.
I do behaive....
not my fault we don't agree how.....
(M60's Girl)
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Spankingcouple
Spanko
Username: Spankingcouple

Post Number: 53
Registered: 11-2005
Posted on Monday, January 16, 2006 - 09:40 pm:   Edit Post

it's rather easy for me to cry during a spanking. when i'm getting a punishment spanking my thoughts and feelings go back to when i was a little girl. i feel as though i'm 5 again. totally helpless and vunrable. i was not abused as a child and i am very thankful for that.

trish
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Babyj
Advanced Spanko
Username: Babyj

Post Number: 537
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Monday, January 16, 2006 - 09:47 pm:   Edit Post

well trish the problem here is at least for me I also go back to being a child and then all I can do is remember the pain and hate and hurt. Then it becomes impossible to cry. I wouldn't give my parents the satisfaction of knowing they could hurt me anymore. I have not cried since I was about 8. I know a lot of others probably can relate to this so I thought I may be able to help and lend a hand. good luck to all and I am thankful that you did not have to go through what I did Trish I wouldn't wish that on anyone. thank you for your imput. hope things go well for you.
I do behaive....
not my fault we don't agree how.....
(M60's Girl)
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Spankingcouple
Spanko
Username: Spankingcouple

Post Number: 54
Registered: 11-2005
Posted on Monday, January 16, 2006 - 10:01 pm:   Edit Post

babyj,i am very sorry for the pain you experienced as a child. child abuse is awful and it needs to stop. a loving spanking is one thing but beyond that it's abuse. these people need to be reported. about 2 years ago i saw a father hitting and shoving a small child and i called the police. i had to testify later in court and the guy was put in jail for 3 months. other people saw this too. so again i am very sorry for what you went through.

my advice for crying dyring a spanking is to clear your thoughts and totally focus on your spanking.

trish
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Katie_spades
Advanced Spanko
Username: Katie_spades

Post Number: 217
Registered: 11-2005
Posted on Tuesday, January 17, 2006 - 11:50 am:   Edit Post

Baby J thank you for the post - althought I am able to cry from a spanking and when I do it is a big release but it is rare. Hunny, feel your pain as far as your parents go; I was never physically abused or spanked (threatened but it never happened,) but verbally they said some awful things. I never feel good eough for them. They have always paid for my education and still do, but should I get a 95, my dad asks me where the other 5 points are... still! The only choices I have for grad school are med school, dental, law, or some PhD program, because in their eyes, those are the only socially acceptable things. I am applying to grad schools right now but I know i'm not doing it for the right reasons, I'm doing it to please them, what I've done my whole life. I'm sorry for ranting and hijacking, I didn't mean to, I guess I just went off on a tangent. My apologies and thanks you Baby J for your posting. I'm sure it will help a lot of people, myself included.
I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.
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Babyj
Advanced Spanko
Username: Babyj

Post Number: 538
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Tuesday, January 17, 2006 - 06:35 pm:   Edit Post

your welcomr Katie and I totally understand what you are going through. and Trish, I am very clad that you did that for that child, I did take my parents to court over it, but it was all dropped and nothing was done. It is difficult for a child to hurt their parents even if they are being abused. Believe it or not agree or not I love my parents and couldn't bare to hurt them, I dropped the charges. Good luck to all of you.
I do behaive....
not my fault we don't agree how.....
(M60's Girl)
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Katie_spades
Advanced Spanko
Username: Katie_spades

Post Number: 226
Registered: 11-2005
Posted on Wednesday, January 18, 2006 - 10:50 pm:   Edit Post

Thanks BabyJ and again, sorry about the troubles that you had but glad to know that now you are doing well and you still love them - I do too, just a little angry I guess. Good for you, I hope that I can get to the point that you are at. That takes a really big person.

I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.
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Carly
New member
Username: Carly

Post Number: 15
Registered: 12-2005
Posted on Monday, January 23, 2006 - 01:31 pm:   Edit Post

I to have a problem getting to the point of crying. I get to a point that I panic, and then I start to fight the spanking. I think I am afraid of going past the point, where I know I have no control and I start to panic, I try to reason with the hubby, and get him talking to me, which I think takes my mind off the spanking itself.. if that makes sense. I guess it will be up to me to let myself get pass the panic point... Not sure how to do that tho.

Carly

hope I made some sort of Sense here
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Tammynx
Advanced Spanko
Username: Tammynx

Post Number: 241
Registered: 10-2005


Posted on Monday, January 23, 2006 - 06:41 pm:   Edit Post

I've had a few tears and a runny nose a few times but I've never been able to cry no matter how much it hurts...I think I love the hurt to much...is that even possible???
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Shylah
Advanced Spanko
Username: Shylah

Post Number: 613
Registered: 10-2005


Posted on Monday, January 23, 2006 - 08:00 pm:   Edit Post

You guys are luckier than you realize. I cry at the drop of a hat...corn flake commercials...I think it's the menopause. Yay for Mother Nature.
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Rosie_bottom
New member
Username: Rosie_bottom

Post Number: 4
Registered: 01-2006
Posted on Tuesday, January 24, 2006 - 08:34 am:   Edit Post

I cry quite easily for a multitude of reasons but have never managed to cry during a spanking, wish I could. I will try the visualisation and relaxation method. Thanks for the post.
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Spankingcouple
Spanko
Username: Spankingcouple

Post Number: 70
Registered: 11-2005
Posted on Tuesday, January 24, 2006 - 08:43 am:   Edit Post

when i cry during a punishment spanking my mind set is that of a child. i'm normally crying after the first few swats. my eyes start to well up before andy takes me acoss his lap. about half way through a punishment spanking i lose all control and cry and cry and kick my feet. i have seen my spankings on video and i was shocked to say the least.

trish
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Katie_spades
Advanced Spanko
Username: Katie_spades

Post Number: 287
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Tuesday, January 24, 2006 - 07:55 pm:   Edit Post

Shylah - I'm on a few medications that are like menapausal and so I sooo know what you mean - an at&t commercail is lethal for me, LOL
I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.
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Babyj
Advanced Spanko
Username: Babyj

Post Number: 546
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Monday, January 30, 2006 - 06:59 pm:   Edit Post

well ladies I actually amanged a few tears recently but it wasn't exactly crying. I am glad you are all able to share your experiences over this perhapse we will all be so lucky to find the release of a good cry when being spanked. Good luck
I do behaive....
not my fault we don't agree how.....
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Katie_spades
Advanced Spanko
Username: Katie_spades

Post Number: 321
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Tuesday, January 31, 2006 - 12:47 am:   Edit Post

Congratulations baby! That is a big step and accomplishment to be proud on. ou go girl!

I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.
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Babyj
Advanced Spanko
Username: Babyj

Post Number: 549
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Wednesday, February 01, 2006 - 05:13 pm:   Edit Post

Thank you Katie I was quite supriSed myself< yet pleased. I gOt anOtHER sPANKing last NIGHt THAT WAs qUIte PaInfUL< yet i found myself Laughing in The middle of it. Hubby wAS lesS than haPPy AboUt ThAT. ladies take My advIce Do NOt LAugh when being SpANKeD IT ONLY GOT WORsE FROM THERE
but I can tell you I will not be acting uP for Quite some tiMe thank you>> ouch
I do behaive....
not my fault we don't agree how.....
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Redhinney
Spanko
Username: Redhinney

Post Number: 164
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Wednesday, February 01, 2006 - 08:55 pm:   Edit Post

I swear I thought that I was the only one who cries during commericals. Did you ever notice that the Kleenze company doesn't have many commericals. that's because they don't have to due to the fact that they are doing great because of all the tissue I buy becasue everyon else's of dam ommericals.

BabyJ- good advice I found that laughung only gets you spanked some more.
Love can't always be seen or hear but will always be felt with your heart
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Katie_spades
Advanced Spanko
Username: Katie_spades

Post Number: 348
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Monday, February 06, 2006 - 06:49 pm:   Edit Post

Baby - laughing? Are you crazy? That's the kiss of death - I should know and won't EVER do it agian, LOL! Glad you finally got the spanking you so deserved!
I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.
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Kennysspankee
Spanko
Username: Kennysspankee

Post Number: 120
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Monday, February 06, 2006 - 07:30 pm:   Edit Post

I've started laughing a few times. I think it was because it was so intense, some sort of overload or something and I just reacted that way. Which made him spank all that much harder which soon stopped me laughing. Then I proceeded into the "owww...aahhh....not so hard!" mode, which he ignored. AAHHHH!! Sweet Memories.
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Spankingcouple
Spanko
Username: Spankingcouple

Post Number: 77
Registered: 11-2005
Posted on Tuesday, February 07, 2006 - 09:51 am:   Edit Post

i wouldn't dare laugh over andy's lap. andy is now using a new paddle he made out in the work shop. this paddle is 3/4 inch think with holes. OMG that paddle STINGS!!! it's a beautiful paddle but it's deadly. i showed the paddle to my sister and she "that should do the trick" as she smiled.

have a good day,
trish
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Kennysspankee
Spanko
Username: Kennysspankee

Post Number: 123
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Tuesday, February 07, 2006 - 07:22 pm:   Edit Post

We only play. If I need to be brought out of a sulky mood, he does it for me. He acts the part.
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Spankingcouple
Spanko
Username: Spankingcouple

Post Number: 80
Registered: 11-2005
Posted on Wednesday, February 08, 2006 - 08:23 am:   Edit Post

sounds like fun. do you role play? we do sometimes.
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Kennysspankee
Spanko
Username: Kennysspankee

Post Number: 128
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Wednesday, February 08, 2006 - 06:31 pm:   Edit Post

Any 'discipline or punishment' spankings I get are basically roleplay, but that doesn't mean they're any less severe. They're worse than how we usually play because he IS in a 'dominant' mode, and that's real when he's there, but he's never angry, just determined to get me a spanking. He starts out hard and fast, almost like he's spanking angry but he's not. He usually grabs a long handled paddle, with a 3 inch head on it (we made it and it's his favorite wood paddle of choice), that's the same as the CB. We have the CB Bethie put up on the thread and I've been fortunate so far that he hasn't picked that. It's about as real as I'll see out of him, I think. He doesn't pay attention to my 'noises' either, just keeps up the pace for a few minutes. Knocks me right outta where I was at and puts me back to myself.
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Spankingcouple
Spanko
Username: Spankingcouple

Post Number: 87
Registered: 11-2005
Posted on Thursday, February 09, 2006 - 07:01 pm:   Edit Post

andy also spanks very hard and for a very long time. somtimes andy will spank for 30 min or more. when he's finished my poor bottom is a bright red and i'm crying like a baby..

trish
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Katie_spades
Advanced Spanko
Username: Katie_spades

Post Number: 394
Registered: 11-2005


Posted on Sunday, February 12, 2006 - 06:58 am:   Edit Post

Ya, I'd never try to act tought when getting a punihsment from Jake - he means serious business and if he thinks he isn't getting throught to me, he just spanks harder and longer.
I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.

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