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Spanking Den * Spanking Discussion Area * March - April 2006 * How do some spankings hurt so much more than others < Previous Next >

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Redhinney
Advanced Spanko
Username: Redhinney

Post Number: 312
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Thursday, March 09, 2006 - 07:37 pm:   Edit Post

Haven't really been around laterly because well to be truthful I was spanked so much I was exhusted. Yes ome of them were the good girl kind and they were great like earth moving great but the spanking that is still very freash (and raw may I add) is the one I ogt for leaving the back door unlocked and wide open all day long while we were at work. A little background here I live on long island in a very nice area we have 2 aces of land so it's not like our neighbors are right up in our face. Bill was upset because he thinks it was an issue of my saftey what happens if someone was in the house. There is a lot of people restoring thier homes so their are workers alll over the place. He isn't saying that because someone works with thier hands that they are more proe to steal or do harm but why invit them in so to speak. Ok I give him that. But the way he went about the spanking has left me quite sore for the last two days. I am still sitting gingerly tonight. I am not complaining that I got spanked because in Bill's defenace he has warned me about this about 1 million times and I just forget of course he says if I didn't always run late I would remember but that's a different story. What I am very courious about is why this time it hurt so much. He did use his belt but he has used that in the past. He wasn't angry or upset by the time i got home so I don't understand why.
Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 2006
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 08:35 am:   Edit Post

I find that the emotional aspect of a spanking is what makes a spanking feel different. I can do spanked rather briskly in a play situation and be laughing, but if I feel badly about what I have done, it seems more serious. I guess I am upset with disappointing myself and my spanker.
Queen of Innocence

"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Smartnnaughty
Advanced Spanko
Username: Smartnnaughty

Post Number: 339
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 08:53 am:   Edit Post

Fanny, you are right! The emotional aspect can make a spanking affect me far more than anything.
I try to take one day at a time -- but sometimes several days attack me at once.
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Pinkcheeks
Spanko
Username: Pinkcheeks

Post Number: 161
Registered: 12-2005


Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 10:25 am:   Edit Post

It's all about the emotional state you are in...gotta agree with Fanny. The disappointment of the situation, along with the anticipation of knowing it's a BG spanking can lend itself to a more painful experience (imho)~~~
"Thought I WAS being a good girl...really I did!"
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Redhinney
Advanced Spanko
Username: Redhinney

Post Number: 315
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 01:50 pm:   Edit Post

Perhaps you're right I was and still a little upset that I left the door wide open Living with Bill has taught me that once a cop always a cop and he will lock this house up at night or when we are gone as if there was gold in it. I once told him that we have more alarms and locks than fort knox and his answer was that the people inside are more important to him than all the gold in the world. Gotta love a man who thinks that you are more valauble than gold.
Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 2008
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 02:50 pm:   Edit Post

You sure do, Red, and he is correct, you are more valuable.
Queen of Innocence

"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Rex138
New member
Username: Rex138

Post Number: 50
Registered: 11-2005
Posted on Saturday, March 11, 2006 - 11:17 am:   Edit Post

Hi Red,

Glad you got what you deserved!

I know that there are different times of the day when one's pain tolerance is greater than other times. Read that once upon a time, somewhere.

But overall I agree with the emotional aspect.

When I first bought the Vermont shower brush, I confess to testing it out first and was somewhat disappointed in the lack of sting.

However when my wife first used it on me. I was about in tears!

Rex
"It seemed like a good idea at the time."
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Carly
New member
Username: Carly

Post Number: 23
Registered: 12-2005
Posted on Saturday, March 11, 2006 - 01:09 pm:   Edit Post

I have heard about that nasty Vermont bathbrush, and I keep my husband away from it's exsistance at all costs. He has a smaller hand held bath brush with a pinup girl on it, and that B**CH hurts more then enough for my behind. So I think we will leave the Vermont Bath Brush. IN VERMONT!! Carly
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie

Post Number: 1377
Registered: 04-2005


Posted on Sunday, March 12, 2006 - 10:24 am:   Edit Post

If your spanker can get in your head before the actual spanking takes place, each swat "feels" as though it hurts twice as much. Steve has spanked me much harder for play and Ive been laughing the whole time. But mention its for discipline and he's disappointed in me...and I'm in tears before he's even started.
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.

Grow old with me, the best is yet to be.
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Me_home_here
New member
Username: Me_home_here

Post Number: 9
Registered: 04-2006
Posted on Wednesday, April 19, 2006 - 07:43 am:   Edit Post

I have found that if I'm upset with myself for having disapointed the other and hopefully loved one. I seem to feel the punishment more intensly and strangely for a longer period of time.
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Ma_vie_en_rose
Spanko
Username: Ma_vie_en_rose

Post Number: 177
Registered: 01-2006


Posted on Wednesday, April 19, 2006 - 05:08 pm:   Edit Post

I think perhaps it's in how we're perceiving it. I mean, if you know it's foreplay, you're more willing than if you know it's actually deserved and punitive.
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Otter
New member
Username: Otter

Post Number: 23
Registered: 03-2006


Posted on Wednesday, April 19, 2006 - 06:56 pm:   Edit Post

Well, I don't feel it for longer but I definitely feel the punishment spankings more *at the time*. Now part of that, I think is that my husband swings harder because he wants to make sure that I get the message. Mostly, though, I think that I am already upset about what I did and I'm scared of what's coming so that doesn't help. (My sadistic husband likes to spice up the day with whispered comments like "I hope you enjoyed doing ABC because you are NOT going to enjoy the consequences." and "I hope you're ready to cry because you're going to..." and other things to heighten the anticipation so that by the time the kids actually get in bed and we are getting down to business I am so wired and nervous that I am practically crying already!)

I don't feel it for longer, though, because since I am already contrite and crying and falling apart, he doesn't spank me for very long. I can't deal with the physical pain very well on top of the emotional stuff, so I can't take very much.

Then, however, I end up feeling like I only got half a spanking. The guilt and conflict is gone but I have all this pent up energy so I usually end up getting a "stress reliever" the next night and those I generally feel for a couple days.
"It was something magic out of something frightening. That's how I live my life, I take it as it comes. In my mind I see the rocking horse inside the tree." -Sara Evans
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Sissy9
New member
Username: Sissy9

Post Number: 1
Registered: 04-2006
Posted on Thursday, April 20, 2006 - 01:02 am:   Edit Post

I have had the back scruber used more than once,by my Dom, and nothing hurts like it, not wood, belt,leather,maybe it's because the plastic dosn't give? I know if the spanking is for punishment, it hurts in a different way. I also know if Iam tired my pain tolerance goes way down too. First thing in the morning,before I'm truly awake is the worst for me. Hi,everyone, Iam new.
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 2155
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Thursday, April 20, 2006 - 10:05 am:   Edit Post

Welcome Sissy, you might want to introduce yourself in the meet and greet area, so everyone knows you are a new member. I find my pain tolernance fluctuates from time of day, day of week and week of month. Also the length of time since my last spanking, too soon hurts more, but if it has been a while, it is even more intense.
Queen of Innocence

"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Batfinch
New member
Username: Batfinch

Post Number: 2
Registered: 04-2006


Posted on Thursday, April 27, 2006 - 04:23 pm:   Edit Post

My daughter who has just had a baby phoned last evening. She was with her other half at his parents and had remembered that the car had been left unlocked with the keys in it.

As she only lives 10 minutes away I drove round locked the car and put the keys in the house.

I know what I would have done to my wife but the younger generation ???
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 2199
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Thursday, April 27, 2006 - 04:27 pm:   Edit Post

C'mon, anyone can make a mistake like this, especially with the responsibility of a new baby. I'm glad you were able to help her out, without much effort on your part. I don't think it has anything to do with the generation as we have members of all ages.}
Queen of Innocence

"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Otter
New member
Username: Otter

Post Number: 48
Registered: 03-2006


Posted on Thursday, April 27, 2006 - 05:34 pm:   Edit Post

Well, I didn't have a new baby when we started this but I did have a 2 year old and two other kids under 8. My husband didn't seem to think that was an excuse for forgetting things.

I would have gotten it big time for leaving the keys in the unlocked car. I get it for leaving the front door unlocked or locking my keys in the car, stuff like that. He says if I get spankings for those things then I will be sure to check if I am not positive they got done or I will put systems in place to make sure they don't happen.

He's right too. I now have a system in place so that I can't leave the house without my spare keys, that way I can't lock my keys in the car. I used to do it about 6 times a year.

We are in our lower 30's, I don't know if we are in the younger generation to you but we definitely are in the age bracket of people who are having new babies so I thought we might qualify! =)
"It was something magic out of something frightening. That's how I live my life, I take it as it comes. In my mind I see the rocking horse inside the tree." -Sara Evans
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Pagan
Advanced Spanko
Username: Pagan

Post Number: 405
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Thursday, April 27, 2006 - 05:50 pm:   Edit Post

Well, I know what it's like to be in a sleep-deprived haze due to the demands of a new baby. I also have three, although my 'baby' is 4.

Fatigue can make anyone make a mistake. Just my opinion, but I don't see a spanking being helpful. She probably needs a nap, not a spanking.

We don't do DD, so I don't get spanked as punishment. But believe me, if I did this, I'd be kicking my own backside.

When my last was six weeks old, I took her into my older kids' school for 'show and tell'. Believe it or not, I left the car RUNNING. But I did lock it. My brother came and met me with a spare set of keys.

I've never done that before, and I've never done it again. Sleep deprivation and the brain cells that seem to be shed during childbirth. Luckily neither are permanent conditions.

I felt stupid enough. Being spanked would have made me feel worse. Overkill.
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny

Post Number: 2200
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Thursday, April 27, 2006 - 06:41 pm:   Edit Post

I agree with you, Pagan. I read somewhere that a mother loses 25% of her memory with the birth of a baby. That would leave me in the negative numbers!!
I think you need to take into account if this is a habitual thing with her or not. I am all for accountability, but situations do matter. I mean, afterall, she was responsible enough to make a call to fix the problem.
Batfinch, just because you deal with your wife in one way, doesn't have anything to do with your daughter. You have no idea (do you?) on what goes on in her private life.
Queen of Innocence

"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Otter
New member
Username: Otter

Post Number: 49
Registered: 03-2006


Posted on Thursday, April 27, 2006 - 06:42 pm:   Edit Post

***We don't do DD, so I don't get spanked as punishment. But believe me, if I did this, I'd be kicking my own backside.***

This is another reason I get spanked, so I will *stop* kicking myself. If I am fatigued and sleep deprived, I am even more likely to blow something like this out of proportion and really dwell on it and feel guilty about all the bad things that could have happened.

One time I locked my keys in the car with my youngest (who was about two at the time) sleeping in the back seat. What was I doing? Running into the store to get a pack of smokes! Did I feel bad? Hells yes, I wanted to jump off the Tacoma Narrows. Did I do it on purpose? No, I just got in a hurry and messed up. Did the spanking that I got for it stop the guilt? Definitely.

It's not about making me feel bad about what I did. I'm a grown woman, I feel bad about what I did because I have a fully developed conscience. DD and spanking is about making me feel better about what I did.

It doesn't work for everyone, that's why everyone doesn't do it.
"It was something magic out of something frightening. That's how I live my life, I take it as it comes. In my mind I see the rocking horse inside the tree." -Sara Evans
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Pagan
Advanced Spanko
Username: Pagan

Post Number: 406
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Thursday, April 27, 2006 - 07:43 pm:   Edit Post

Otter, I understand and respect that being punished makes some people feel better. Not for me, but vive la difference.

It's different though when you want it for the release of guilt, and when it's done to punish you. A subtle difference, perhaps, but one I see regardless.
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Otter
Spanko
Username: Otter

Post Number: 51
Registered: 03-2006


Posted on Friday, April 28, 2006 - 12:06 am:   Edit Post

***It's different though when you want it for the release of guilt, and when it's done to punish you. A subtle difference, perhaps, but one I see regardless.***

This is true and I have to admit, that even though we call it punishment and they are more severe when they are punishment, the spanking is not the real punishment. The real punishment is the lecture and the disappointment I feel in myself because I know he doesn't make rules that are not important to him. He doesn't make rules just because he can.

The spanking is just the ritual to clear the air and show that it's all done and taken care of. If the spanking were the punishment, that wouldn't really work.

And yeah, if we were all the same it would be pretty boring in here! "Oh, we do DD!" "Oh, us too!" ...well, alrighty then...=)

o*
"It was something magic out of something frightening. That's how I live my life, I take it as it comes. In my mind I see the rocking horse inside the tree." -Sara Evans
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Louiseoc
New member
Username: Louiseoc

Post Number: 10
Registered: 04-2006
Posted on Friday, April 28, 2006 - 01:30 am:   Edit Post

I never get the impression that my husband is disappointed with me when he spanks me. His range of emotions tend to go from 'mildly irritated' to 'extremely pissed off'. He's never mentioned being disappointed or sad, his temperement is choleric rather than melancholic. he's a little like Ricky Ricardo in 'I Love Lucy', Ricky frequently got mad with Lucy but I don't remember him every being sad or disappointed. I think on the whole I prefer this. Irritated or pissed off I can cope with, but I think a sad and disappointed husband would be more difficult.
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Otter
Spanko
Username: Otter

Post Number: 52
Registered: 03-2006


Posted on Friday, April 28, 2006 - 02:13 am:   Edit Post

He's not the one that is disappointed with me, I am. He is always pissed or disbelieving. He says things like "what the hell were you thinking?" and "why would you do that? You know I hate it when you do that!" or I really like "Did you do this *expressly* to piss me off?" It's just complete incredulity. I also like this.
"It was something magic out of something frightening. That's how I live my life, I take it as it comes. In my mind I see the rocking horse inside the tree." -Sara Evans
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Victoria_wood
New member
Username: Victoria_wood

Post Number: 38
Registered: 04-2006
Posted on Friday, April 28, 2006 - 08:08 am:   Edit Post

I don't think I would like being spanked when M was actually upset with me. It seems to me that that would feel really bad.

Plus she never gets mad at me, and I don't do a lot of things that I feel the need to beat myself up over.
Cheers,
Victoria
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Louiseoc
New member
Username: Louiseoc

Post Number: 11
Registered: 04-2006
Posted on Friday, April 28, 2006 - 10:50 am:   Edit Post

Funny, I didn't think I would like it if my husband spanked me when he was really annoyed with me about something, but I have found that I do. The first time it happened I was very disturbed, but then I thought why not, why shouldn't he get satisfaction out of it as well as me? I know it pleases him to take it out on my bottom when he is really annoyed about something, and I find it pleases me too. It's certainly a lot better than being shouted at. Most of the things I do are not things I feel very guilty about, or that make him seriously angry, they're more at the 'mildly irritated' end of the scale, and I don't feel all that guilty about them. On the very rare occasions when something does make me feel guilty, I find it gives me an even deeper satisfaction to be chastised for it. And it means wer're not having a flaming row, and I'm not getting upset and going silent and withdrawn for hours or even days, like I used to. It's a great improvement.
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Victoria_wood
New member
Username: Victoria_wood

Post Number: 41
Registered: 04-2006
Posted on Friday, April 28, 2006 - 11:20 am:   Edit Post

Interesting. Well M spanks me for leaving my dirty dishes around the house, but just as a pretense. But then sometimes I think that she really is annoyed by it. I don't like the idea that she is actually annoyed. If I thought she were, I would not leave them around.

One time she was all agitated from pms and I convinced her to work out her frustrations on my bottom, but those frustrations weren't with me.

I don't want to feel that I have really displeased her, so maybe I am more of a sub than I want to think (defining the desire to please as central to submission).
Cheers,
Victoria
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Louiseoc
New member
Username: Louiseoc

Post Number: 12
Registered: 04-2006
Posted on Friday, April 28, 2006 - 03:29 pm:   Edit Post

Well, I do have the desire to please my husband, but it doesn't always work out. Sometimes I just forget to do things he's told me to do, or overlook something, and I am apt to be sulky or petulant when he tells me off about it. Mostly I get spanked for attitude, being rude or sulky or bad-tempered, though these days he can usually put me back in a good mood with just a few words, or sometimes even a look. The thing that annoys him most is if I let the children do something that he's told them not to do, that invariably results in a very severe spanking. I don't do things on purpose to annoy him, but stuff just happens sometimes.

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