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Highwayman
New member
Username: Highwayman

Post Number: 32
Registered: 05-2005
Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 10:38 am:   Edit Post

Was doing some daily reading and came across this story of an Iowa man who was arrested for kidnapping and raping his wife. The Smoking Gun website posted a "contract" that he drew up for his wife, which she did not sign. What do you all think of this (the contract, not the rape)?

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0217062contract1.html
Alas, he was the Highwayman
The one who comes and goes
And only the Highway Woman
Keeps up with the likes of those...
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Ftopinmichigan
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ftopinmichigan

Post Number: 473
Registered: 09-2005


Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 12:35 pm:   Edit Post

I only skimmed the full "contact," but have to say this is probably a text book case of a man in fantasyland that is spending far too much time online, and in his own mind. He probably found something similar online, in a cyber playroom, or in fictional story database.

He is clearly not living in reality, and while some aspects of the contract may hint to a "lifestyle" interest, and a BDSM theme by some standards, he is unrealistic in that all of this is in HIS thoughts, and in no way agreed upon by his spouse. Slavery is not legal in the US. Even WITH consent, this contract would be deemed illegal, and I'm sure coercion will be part of the case as well.

A contract like this is illegal and unenforceable, but I'm also sure it will be used against him in a court of law.

Too many people get lost in fantasy, and the confusion to real life is hurtful, or even criminal in some cases.

It is truly this type of case that causes others to view the "lifestyle" in a bad light. THIS contact, and the man's alleged crimes do not sound like anything related to the lifestyle.

I think this man will spend a lot of (deserved)time in prison to think about his "contract," if it's proven he perpetrated crimes against his wife and the minor child mentioned.

Some people get into a false sense of power, and "consent" with these "contracts." They are not worth the paper they are printed on.

K
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Ma_vie_en_rose
Spanko
Username: Ma_vie_en_rose

Post Number: 62
Registered: 01-2006


Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 01:00 pm:   Edit Post

My friend showed me that last night, I think the term "Spousal abuse Monopoly" came up in describing it.

I could see influences perhaps from things like L'histoire d'O, though perhaps I was inventing the links for my own ease.


quote:

Too many people get lost in fantasy, and the confusion to real life is hurtful, or even criminal in some cases.




I was in a relationship where that happened. I know from the submissive point of view that it's hard to suddenly realise that you have no control, but moreover that you're not sure if you can trust the one who does have control. It's confusing, maddening, sickening, and you feel that there's no one to blame but yourself.

I try to wonder how much the woman had agreed to previously, what their status had been before this contract. If she even knew, but it's good to see that she did do what she needed to with this and stood her ground.

It's not even just to vanilla people that things like that give a bad rap to the lifestyle; it's things like that which threaten even involved member's involvement
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Redhinney
Advanced Spanko
Username: Redhinney

Post Number: 262
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Thursday, February 23, 2006 - 05:08 pm:   Edit Post

Today I went to Somking gun and tried to read the full contract. Please notice I said tried because there were times I just couldn't stop myself from laughing. I mean golly he gave her a full 20 minutes after the kids were in bed to get her clothes off. What was he thinkingshe could have gotten her clothes off much faster becasue she wasn't allowed to wear to much to begining with.

Were do men get these ideas? This contact is right up there with Bill's idea that because I am going thru a stress period at work that I might need to get spanked more you know for stress relief so he suggested a spanking every other day. Like I was going to say "Yes dear" There's as much chance of that happening as me walking on the moon.

So this bright person (Albert eisteien need not worry) is in jail for rape and kidnapping and he is at a total lost why. I think the man ws thinking with the wrong head- perhaps his little one. Bill and I have some aspects of a D/s relationship and I think that many people who are into spanking might as well but to force someone is just way over the line. Yes we all push limits but we all kniw what limits can be pushed and what ones can't.

Press like this makes so much harder for the us normal kinky people to be us.
Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart
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Sinderella
New member
Username: Sinderella

Post Number: 30
Registered: 01-2006


Posted on Friday, February 24, 2006 - 12:23 pm:   Edit Post

To quote Redhinney "Press like this makes it so much hard for us normal kinky people to be us"

That is so true! Dirtbags like this guy give us a bad rap. What was this guy thinking you ask? Himself. Yeah well lets see the fool try to write up a contract like that in prison. What a jerk. Ok, i'm done ranting LOL.
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Shylah
Advanced Spanko
Username: Shylah

Post Number: 686
Registered: 10-2005


Posted on Friday, February 24, 2006 - 05:21 pm:   Edit Post

Ok...I read the "contract".

My first impression...

Go F*** yourself fella.

What idiot in his right mind will think for one single minute that a grown woman would agree to such a thing? IF..and I stress IF a woman wants that type of relationship, a contract can be made up but by both parties. And BOTH parties must agree to it.

That contract...oh I just can't find the words to describe what I'm thinking.

What a wanker. Lock him up and throw away the key.
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Redhinney
Advanced Spanko
Username: Redhinney

Post Number: 268
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Friday, February 24, 2006 - 05:32 pm:   Edit Post

I talked to Bill about this we both agreed that hte men needed a reality check but Bill added that he thought this mans reality check bounced.
Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart
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Pinkwench
Spanko
Username: Pinkwench

Post Number: 70
Registered: 12-2005


Posted on Saturday, February 25, 2006 - 11:50 pm:   Edit Post

I read it thought it was hilarious reading, and then I wondered what size brain this guy was thinking with when he came up with this.
My other thought is send him to jail and let's see if he can negotiate this contract with his cellmate, Bubba
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Ftopinmichigan
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ftopinmichigan

Post Number: 482
Registered: 09-2005


Posted on Sunday, February 26, 2006 - 05:51 am:   Edit Post

I've seen this topic on multiple BDSM lists. Pinkwench, you're response is the best one I've read!

K
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Pinkcheeks
Spanko
Username: Pinkcheeks

Post Number: 136
Registered: 12-2005


Posted on Monday, February 27, 2006 - 07:53 am:   Edit Post

Great response Pinkwench!
I read the contract too - first I just shook my head in disbelief, then realized that there ARE guys out there that are like this!! The rest of the contract was just plain laughable!
"Thought I WAS being a good girl...really I did!"
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Tammynx
Advanced Spanko
Username: Tammynx

Post Number: 315
Registered: 10-2005


Posted on Monday, February 27, 2006 - 10:31 am:   Edit Post

I'm with you Pinkcheecks...I read the contract....I shook my head...I just couldn't believe it. But your right there are guys out there that are like this. I guess to each his own....but geeeezzzzz
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Kennysspankee
Spanko
Username: Kennysspankee

Post Number: 161
Registered: 05-2005


Posted on Monday, February 27, 2006 - 05:19 pm:   Edit Post

Yeah, if he was smart he'd have stuff like,-you will not decide to do the dishes or laundry as soon as I get into the shower.-you will not stand in front of the TV and ask "Whatcha watchin'?" when I'm watching the hockey game or a car show.-you will not come in and "see what else is on" and get the guide up on the TV screen when I'm watching a car show (or anything else). Useful things, ya know?
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Redhinney
Advanced Spanko
Username: Redhinney

Post Number: 275
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Monday, February 27, 2006 - 08:15 pm:   Edit Post

As bad as this might sound when you think about it the fact was that it wasn't consenual that really got the jerk in trouble. The female in the relationship must have stayed or tried it for a while or it wouldn't have been considered rape or kidnapping and then decided that she wanted out. Which we all have the right to do at anytime

I think that there are many of these so called arrangments than we think there are. The idea of submission to some sound wonderful and I think once they try it it isn't all roses and some knight in shinning armor is coming to take you away to his kingdomas some romance stories tend to be.

I actual feel sorry for both of them because both of them need thier heads examined his for writting this up and thinking that it was a contract of no return and her for having her desires and dreams tanish by such a bad realtionship lead by a stuipd little man.

watch out Bubba here he comes
Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart

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